I recently went to Tijuana with my church. Our church supports local missionaries there, so we went to help in the ministries they are currently working with. And I came back mainly discouraged. I spent most of my time in the orphanage. James, the local missionary, again informed us there are about 150 orphanages in Tijuana alone, each with 40-70 kids. This averages 7,500 orphans just in this small area of Mexico. He also informed us that Mexico has made it impossible for these kids to be adopted by Americans and so difficult for locals, that most will be there until the age of 18. When they turn 18, some will live on the streets, some become prostitutes or get pregnant, and others worse. I held a four month old baby, and looked down into her beautiful, smiling face knowing that she will never have the love of a mother and a father. She will live there for seventeen and a half more years.
While I realize I am painting a bleek picture, there were things that I saw in the orphanage that showed God's grace in the midst of a terrible situation. These kids have a bond with one another that makes them family. They have four women there who love them incredibly and have made it their life purpose to take care of and love them. These kids find joy in simple things such as a silly relay race or games with water balloons. These kids have a love and passion for Christ that is evident in the songs they sing and the smiles they share.
But I still hurt and I still struggle. Sometimes I struggle to come back and see this life that I have. I'm embarrassed by the things that I stress about or get upset about. I realize how blessed I am- in more ways than one. How did I get so lucky? Why wasn't I born into poverty or as an orphan? I know that I am no more special to God than they are. And yet here I sit, typing on my laptop about the injustices of life.
So, I come back to my original thought. Now that I am aware, what is next? What do I do with this new knowledge? Is it simply enough to pray for them? What can I possibly do for kids from a system that is broken? How do I take this knowledge and make a difference? Becoming aware is difficult, because now that I am, I can't go back to the blissful ignorance that I once enjoyed.
